FAKE SMILE

Fake smile.. Hmmm!!

That “all is well” smile we put up when actually all isn’t well. That smile we wear on our faces that doesn’t come from the heart.

“All piece of bullshit and goddamn nonsense”, I curse aloud with passion.

I reason within myself.

Why smile on the street when the mind is so sad? They say it is to hide your troubles and pretend all is well.
Why smile at a neighbour you are not at peace with? They say it is to make believe – smile eases the tension.

Pure lies! I say they are pure lies!! Total bullshit!!! Hypocrisy!!!!

Let me tell you a story…my story I mean.

“Is this Bayo?” Mrs Tinuke asked with a big smile as he embraced my weak body.

I had been on the road for 5 hours, finally I arrived at Ilesha. The journey was quite an uncomfortable one for I traveled with my two boxes on my laps, coupled with the fact that I had to sit in the middle of two old women who were talking to themselves over my face. It was an unbearable feeling. The journey was over anyways, and here I was in my uncle’s house deep down in Osun state. I had gained admission to study at Osun State University and Uncle Kola’s place was going to be my home away from home for the next four years while I pursued my bachelors degree in animal science.

“Bayo, you’re now a big boy oh,” Mrs Tinuke continued with a big smile on her face. “Come and drop your bags here and sit, pele dear”.

Mrs Tinuke whom I call “mummy” is my uncle’s dearest wife and not to ignore, she has been named by the rest of the relatives as a tough woman who never wanted members of her husband relatives around.
I remember one story I heard about her in the past. She turned her husband’s youngest brother to her house-keeper until the young man decided to vacate the house without being told. I don’t blame him, I would do worse if I were in his shoes – I’m no stupid woman’s slave.

This same woman decided to be extremely nice and she dashed me money gifts occasionally. I did more than enough house chores and whenever I complain to my mum back in Lagos, she’ll say “it is good to endure…everything that has a beginning will surely have an end.” Those words kept me from grumbling even when it seemed like I was going to.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’m a graduate today and I’m no longer under that roof although I chose not to stay under that roof as soon as I got into my third year. I couldn’t bear doing many house-chores when I had many other things to do with my time, maybe I’m just a bit lazy – maybe, I said.

From the moment I stepped out to find a place to stay with some of my colleagues, I began to get that fake smile from my auntie whenever I came visiting or our paths crossed and I questioned myself back then if there was anything wrong in finding one’s feet – some people just don’t want you to get up on your own, all they want is someone calling on them for everything so that they could have a say over one’s life.
“I was growing and no one was going to control my life for me,” I thought.

I got a lot of that wicked smile – yes, wicked! That’s the right one. Funny enough, no one saw the scorn under the smile, it was just me.

I remember one very funny one.

I came visiting at the beginning of a new session when I was resuming for my final year. I came with my dad and it was all greeting here and there but I could see from her smile that she just wanted to get out of the house for us – myself, my uncle and my dad – at that moment and I kept on pulling her legs, I must have got her pissed that day. LOL!

“Bayo, Bayo”, she said smiling warmly and patting me on the back. “Bayo that has chosen to stay on his own, o ti di big boy.”

I got the meaning in that statement even as she laughed as if she was cool with my staying away.

Fake smile!
How I wish I could rip the heart of all these hypocrites and get them to pay for those fake smiles – it burns my heart when I see someone faking a smile.
I love when people give me a fake smile. The only person that can deduce a fake smile is that person whom the smile is directed to – we know we are not on talking terms and we are not cool so why pretend by giving me that smile when we are in the presence of people.

Common, take your smile back. I actually don’t give a fuck too… Thanks!

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